Even with the obsession of alcohol and drugs removed, you as a recovering alcoholic and/or addict may still be plagued by the overwhelming distress of anxiety and fear. This can cause you to feel uncomfortable in your own skin from even as early as the moment you first wake up. Though you may have been suggested to simply stop being anxious, the task isn’t as simple as it may seem. However, more freedom can always be found during your walk through the process of recovery as more is revealed during your journey.
When you find victory over your addiction to alcohol and/or drugs, you may feel great relief until reality sets in and you come to realize that these substances were but a symptom of the illness in which you were greatly tormented by. You did get down to the causes and the conditions of what was driving your addiction, which got you physically sober. However, you still have to continually work on your character defects on a regular basis in order to maintain your sobriety and stay mentally, emotionally, and spiritually sound. Having the ability to look at the truth, not just in your own head but with the assistance of another human being aids in this process like clockwork because the reality is that your perception is deceiving. Your mind plays tricks on you and can lead you into unwarranted judgement where you can easily slip through the cracks. This process is imperative so that you can let go of your defects, otherwise you will have trouble staying in the present moment and remain anxious over careless and meaningless aspects like the slow car in front of you, the cranky neighbor, or tripping down the stairs.
Letting Go Of Fear
You seem to think you can control manifestations of your illness but this is a false reality. It’s delusional thinking because the more you try to control areas of your life, the worse your character defects become. Ultimately, this is a progressive illness and you are just catapulting your addictive nature by fueling the beast. This is why coming out of self-denial is climacteric. It may be too often that you get carried away in what doesn’t matter because of controlling behaviors. Instead, do not be anxious over little aspects in life and get carried away about the future in response to it. As an alcoholic and/or addict, you may look toward the future in an attempt to plan because of this control. The desire to control can originate for a variety of reasons with a couple being that you might have been controlled previously, so controlling has become an acquired behavior for you and the behavior makes you feel secure. It’s a tough task to relinquish this latching nature of control but by letting go of what no longer serves you, you may notice a relief of anxiety and see there’s far more to life than what you eat, drink, wear, or put on your face. Life is what you make of it and sobriety can show you this when you are present by bringing you back down to reality.
When you are worried about tomorrow, you are tarnishing the time happening TODAY. You are crushing time. Don’t destroy time when you have it. It’s a precious gift, especially when you are sober to actually experience and remember it, so enjoy it.
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