Being parents of addicts is a matter that most families didn’t quite anticipate even imagining to happen to them until it was made full-blown aware that the disease of addiction was causing their child to act out so outrageously. While some families get torn apart and others remain together though distraught, either way, they encounter the battle to save their child’s life. On top of this, parents often accumulate cycling thoughts of self-doubt and remorseful guilt as they question whether their child’s addiction had something to do with them. Learning to cope with your child’s addiction is a tricky matter, but rest assured that it is not your fault and that you just need to find some acceptance.
Parents of Addicts
Guilt is uncomfortable and unpleasant. As parents of addicts, you’re probably already overwhelmed with the extremity of where addiction has brought your child and you don’t need any feelings of guilt to additionally topple over that. The truth is that nothing that you did caused or would have prevented your child’s addiction. You need to understand that this addiction is not a choice and that they are powerless over that drug. Your child did not wish to be an addict any more than you wished to be the parent of one.
Dealing with Pain
You probably saw the life you knew with your child changed drastically. Maybe there’s not a specific day you can remember when you realized you didn’t recognize your child anymore, but looking back on it you could probably recall a slew of instances in which your child echoed verbally aggressive, disruptive, defensive, or isolative behavior leading up to the complete personality change that drugs ultimately took as an effect on their life. The world you lived and the child you knew suddenly were completely different, but you have to understand that this was not by your doings and that no love could have stopped their addiction cycle. It can be devastating when you dwell on the past and who your child was, so just focus on the fact that the beloved little child you knew is sick and that you need to help them get better by supporting them and seeking treatment for them to get better.
It can be extremely difficult when you are playing the blame game and backtracking in your mind where you went wrong as parents of addicts, but the truth is that you didn’t necessarily go wrong anywhere. Your child has a disease and the addiction was inevitable after that first drug. Allowing yourself to be freed from the guilt is okay. Your family can make it through the peril that the disease of addiction has caused, but the more that you cast blame on yourself, the more you will unrightfully resent yourself for something that you simply had no control over. Do what you can now as a parent and be by your child’s side during this difficult time.
If you need more support and would like help in coping with your child's addiction, we can help. The Watershed's Family Outreach program can help support you during this difficult time of healing and recovery. Click here for more information: The Watershed Family Outreach Program
Looking for more? Click here: If Prevention Can't Stop Addiction
If you are unsure of what to do about your child’s addiction, call The Watershed today at 1-877-975-4837. Let us help you get your child’s life back on track.