Before your loved one entered the process of recovery, you may have never had a happy St. Patrick’s Day together. It’s probably safe to say that like a countless amount of other holidays, St. Patrick’s Day was yet another excuse for your loved one to get drunk or high and humiliate family and friends. Now you can put that to rest because your loved one is in recovery. It’s pivotal to know what behaviors you can expect to see from your loved one, how you can be there to support your loved one, and the signs of codependency you should be on the lookout for so that you can avoid enabling your loved one this St. Patrick’s Day.
Happy St. Patrick’s Day!
A happy St. Patrick’s Day begins for you and your loved one because of a change having occurred within your loved one. Your loved one has put in the effort to make a significant difference in their life and it has no doubt shown otherwise they wouldn’t be where they currently are in their sobriety. The impact has brought them to where they presently are. St. Patrick’s Day should ideally unite you and your loved because that is what holidays are all about. They bring loved ones together in the moment to focus on rejoicing where they are, highlighting the positive attributes.
What to expect from your loved one in recovery
You might have noticed your loved one isn’t always going to have a good mood all the time and this can be attributed to their disease of addiction, which has no known cure. Being in recovery doesn’t mean that your loved one has necessarily worked out all the kinks but rather that they have made improvements in their life. This means they are willing to work to make changes on their defects of character to make amends for where they have particularly caused harm. This by no means constitutes that they adhere to a perfect program. Even on holidays like a happy St. Patrick’s Day, your loved one may get overwhelmed, especially if they see alcohol and/or substances at an event. Try to be patient with your loved one and understand where they are coming from. They may not want to discuss the issue with you and instead may take it out on you by becoming irritable. It doesn’t mean that its right, but it just means their temperament could use fine tuning.
How to show your loved one support
Show support by being there to revel in it! Spending time with your loved one can make a difference in their recovery and pull them out of a slump. Make the commitment to plan time for them. If you’re with them and you notice them becoming triggered by seeing alcohol at every street corner, you can help them by re-shifting their focus on the importance of the festivities being on spending time with one another, which is what holidays are meant for. Holidays are for pleasure with one another. Ideas you might consider could include attending an Irish-themed festival in honor of St. Patrick’s Day where you can see dancers in the street with fiddlers, watching a local parade, or making a special Irish meal for dinner at home. When you’re taking part in these activities together, be sure to show support by listening to your loved one’s needs. If your loved one sounds stressed or appears to grow frantic seeing others abusing substances, then use your best judgement to pull yourself out of the situation. A St. Patrick’s Day parade may be too much for recovering individuals and can overwhelm them, especially too early during their recovery process if there’s an excessive amount of binge drinking going on at the festivities.
Beware of being codependent with your loved one
Another matter to be wary of is enabling your loved one. You don’t want to become codependent with your loved one during St. Patrick’s Day. It’s easy to slip into this role during a holiday when you’re spending time with them because you latch onto the idea when you get overly friendly with your loved one and partner up with them. You may want to do tasks for your loved one and nurture them, but doing this will only prevent them from being able to complete tasks on their own and cut them off from continuing on with their own recovery process. You don’t want to prevent them from getting better!
Have a happy St. Patrick’s Day this year with your loved one this year now that they are sober and you can both celebrate happily in the present moment. There’s much more to life when you’re able to stay in the moment occurring and be aware of it as its happening. Showing support of your loved one is essential for both of you during this time and knowing what signs play a role in the process of the recovery on holidays can help you to be able to encourage them while being there for them without enabling.